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Long Term Care - A Family Decision
  
As parents age and slowly need more support it often falls upon children to provide it. This is a gradual process that initially presents itself as part of the everyday fabric of family life from mowing a lawn to moving some furniture. Siblings discuss the needs of the parent and how they can share the load of providing assistance. It is a task that initially is enjoyed and provides a sense of retribution. Invariably a loose plan is concocted that graduates from spot help to regular visits. Soon everyday chores like shopping, meal preparation, and housekeeping begin to take on greater significance. Scheduling of medical needs and the provision of transportation gain increasing frequency. This is a situation that happens everyday, all across America. Like so many situations, the slow pace of the changing need leads to reactive measures. This very response, although helpful and filled with the best intentions, leads to an eventual realization that the demand is greater than the resource. This moment, illuminated by hindsight, shows how important early planning can be. It is always better for all concerned to be proactive rather than reactive. Children have the best intentions, and their parent's well being at heart, but do not bring the type of sound detailed planning that often is a hallmark of their personal lives or professional careers

Interestingly throughout this whole process the subject of Professional Care is rarely raised. The increase in the degree of supportive need is so gradual there is little open discussion of a time when family members will not be capable of meeting it. There are many reasons for this; denial of the inevitable that loved ones will someday cease to be the type of people we always viewed them as, an aversion to discussing such a negative scenario with someone that is getting advanced in years, guilt over suggesting that paid professionals would be better than family members. All of these reasons lead to a complicated, stressful and financially daunting outcome that with the right approach can be avoided.

It's a statistical fact that the majority of us at some point will need consistently provided supportive care. It has been well documented how the cost of long-term care is often viewed. People mistakenly assume Medicaid and or Medicare will provide for this need. Nothing could be further from the truth. Medicare is not intended for long term care expenses and Medicaid will only step in as the payer of last resort meaning that federal poverty guidelines will have to be met in order to qualify. The phrase, "asset spend own", sounds familiar but no one ever really reflects upon what that means. How do children go from reactive care providers to proactive participants in their parents aging years. One strong plan is the securing of a Long Term Care Insurance policy. The question then becomes how to accomplish this.

Discuss it now - While Insurance is Still an Option
There is a challenge in broaching the subject. In order for a long-term care insurance policy to be truly cost effective it should be purchased before the need for care. The older a person is the higher the premiums to the point that at advanced age insurance carriers will not issue a policy. Thus, in order for a policy to be in place, children would have to discuss this subject with their parent at a time when they are relatively healthy. Speaking with Mom and Dad about long-term care just when they are settling into their golden years free of financial obligations obviously could be an uncomfortable situation. Especially given that Long Term Care insurance is really asset protection from catastrophic need. The fact of the matter is that if children are going to be involved in parental care, proper early planning will only raise the quality of that participation. The point to make will be the totality of the plan, not just the Long Term Care policy

LTC insurance DOES NOT Mean You're Sending Your Parents To A Nursing Home.
It is an inevitable transition in the family relationship that children are going to be involved in the care of their elderly parents in some capacity. Discussing with parents that you will be there to help is not so alien as to cause great discomfort. What could cause some trepidation is raising the issue of the medical necessity for the provision of professional long-term care and how that will be paid for. Here is where a case should be made that Long Term Care insurance is an addition to the care that family members want to provide. The inclusion of a policy that will contribute does not mean that the involvement and personal attention of children will be replaced. It will be augmented in order to keep a true balance between siblings and to ensure the avoidance of a situation that may become out of everyone's control. This will be especially pertinent if one parent needs extensive care such as a nursing home. In this scenario the spouse left behind will be under tremendous financial and emotional pressure to continue to keep as much of the traditional family environment that was always enjoyed by all. Like so many challenges in life, initiating the action is the hardest step. The next time your providing some assistance with a parent, it could be as simple as moving a table, mention that it means a lot to help, and that your concern is that the best assistance will always be available. From there begin to talk about how you have been thinking about various ways to ensure that happens.

Stress That LTC Insurance Will Keep Your Options Open
We all have a deep down conviction that no matter what the situation, we can always get through it. This rationalization is acceptable when it comes to our own comfort or challenges. However, the case should be made with a parent, that the goal is to ensure a positive outcome. Indicate this when mentioning the option of a Long Term Care policy. Do not be afraid to say, "we are here, we will always be here, but we want to know that every measure has been taken to ensure that the best of care is available for you, at all times, without exception". This does not take away from children providing all they can, it adds to it. What this thought conveys is that even now, well before the need, we are thinking about you.

Research Is The First Step… No Obligations, No Costs.
It is safe to say that during this initial discussion the issue of cost will be raised. As with many purchase decisions, investigation is warranted into the complete situation before accepting or rejecting it. Convey to the parent that it is free to look into this product, gather information and make an informed and educated decision about whether it is best or not. Generally speaking, the more educated people become about the financial realities of needing Long Term Care, the more attractive insurance begins to look. Children should not be afraid to contemplate participating financially in the cost of the policy. A family that is thinking about the well being of their parents, the overall health of the family relationship, and are focused on a strong proactive early plan, may find family financial participation to be a good idea. It is highly likely, that at some point, the challenge of assisting elderly parents will arise. If the concern is truly there, investigation of a Long Term Care insurance policy makes good sense.

Families discuss, plan, and do so much together for the good of all involved that it is unfortunate that early planning for a statistically inevitable situation is so often avoided. Sound planning for the eventual aging of parents should not be avoided because there is a fear of an uncomfortable conversation. The expression by a child of true concern to a parent can never be a negative. The inclusion of the suggestion of a Long Term Care insurance policy in that overall context will not alter that intent. 

Medical conditions such as Cancer, Leukemia, Hodgkin's Disease, Parkinson's Disease, stroke, depression may not preclude you from coverage.  No cost or obligation Inquiry Request Form.

More Regarding Long-Term Care

NY Times Article: About Long-Term Care Insurance